Sunday, March 22, 2009

World, world, go away...

I was finally over the flu. I'd spent a week catching up on my work and sleep, and was starting to feel halfway sane. I was on the way to take my first full ballet class since surgery, the paperwork for which I think has finally been straightened out after about a month on the phone with insurance companies.

Then the guy in front of me decides not to be assertive merging into the Concord rotary, stops halfway into an intersection, and I rear-end him while watching incoming traffic. Now I have more confusing paperwork to fill out and mail, and I end up with higher monthly car insurance payments. Like I'm not broke enough already.

Fantabulous. Just the way I wanted to finish off my spring break.

Monday, March 16, 2009

Spring Break!

Hey all,

I am finally on spring break and am very excited/relieved about it. This semester is a bit on the crazy packed side. I'm "taking" 4 classes, teaching a math class, teaching ballet, and, of course, trying to work on my research for my dissertation. When I say that I'm "taking" 4 classes, what I really mean is that I am attending the classes and will be doing a presentation for most of them. I don't do homework anymore, so at least I'm not bogged down with all of that. But the classes themselves take up a decent amount of time. And I do occasionally do reading for them.

I'm not upset to be busy again. It's how I spent the majority of my life up until a few years ago, and there is a part of me that functions best when I am over-scheduled and just have to keep going 24/7. I do like being able to sleep in, play with my cats, and generally chill out every once in a while, though.

I think my saving grace this semester is that I am not doing the spring Dance Prism show. I miss everyone, but I am really glad that I get my weekends to myself. And honestly, I don't like performing, especially ballet. It's stressful and the costumes always make me feel like I need to diet (sometimes I do, sometimes I don't, but on the whole, fuck that shit). My last year of college I really made an effort not to schedule things on the weekends. It gave me some time to myself, but mostly served as time when I knew I was free to do all the random stuff that didn't fit into a busy week. I think I need to make that my policy again; no regularly scheduled weekend activities.

I had my phone interview with the Johns Hopkins CTY program this morning, who I want to teach for this summer. I have no idea if it went well. I think so. They'll be getting back to me in a week or two. I really hope I get a position. I don't even care where at this point. Once I sat down and started planning the enrichment course I realized that I really really want a chance to teach it. I'm being considered to teach a class called "Individually Paced Math Sequence," which is exactly what it sounds like. I think the class basically consists of the students doing their own work while I walk around and answer questions. Not hugely challenging. I get 45 minutes every day to do "enrichment material," which is supposed to be something that they can all manage. I decided to do some very elementary group theory, which really is not as complicated as it sounds. Mostly they will be working with cutout squares, circles and triangles.

I am also going to Bates Dance Festival this summer. If I get hired by CTY, I will be away from home for a straight 6 weeks (3 weeks at wherever CTY sends me and then 3 weeks in Maine at Bates). My cats are going to be pissed. But I am super psyched about going to Bates. I don't care if I have to answer phones or whatever for the rest of the summer, as long as I have those three weeks in heaven.

So yeah, that's my life right now. Oh yeah, hip's doing well. I've been to a few dance classes but mostly I've been running. It's actually surprisingly enjoyable. Up until about two months ago, if someone asked me if I wanted to go running, I would reply, "Only if a bear is chasing me." The fact that I actually like running now is rather embarassing. Ah well, we all change as we get older. I have my first physical therapy appointment today at 4 actually. I really hope that I like the PT and that she doesn't make me do exercises that don't really help with what I care about. I suppose I should defer to someone whose career is fixing people's bodies, but the vast majority of physical therapists I've come in contact with have no idea how to deal with dancers. I have actually uttered the phrase, "No, my ankle is supposed to do that..." during a PT session where I was stretching out my thigh by holding onto my foot. They also don't seem to realize that my legs have to go all the way up/back/to the side. This office is supposed to be good for non-sport athletes (ie gymnasts, dancers). So here's hoping.

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Theraband Care

When I googled "theraband care," I failed to find any websites with useful information. As a result of my own experimentation, however, I have found a solution that I would like to share.

I have a light grey theraband that I got in college that is now somewhat grubby and sticky. I tried washing it, thinking that the dirt and stuff on it would make it sticky, but that only made it worse (and did not get rid of the dirt streaks). The solution I found is to rub baby powder into the band - I didn't really have to rub the powder "in," just coat the band with a thin layer. I imagine that talc would work just as well. I get some powder on my hands when I use it now, but for the most part it's back to new. And it smells nice (no more feet smell!).

So there, hope that's useful...

PS- I get my stitches out tomorrow!

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Gimp post!

Happy New Year everyone! Sorry I haven't posted for over a month. December was a black hole of busy. Nutcracker performances went off practically without a hitch, despite a plethora of sprained ankles (5 or 6 people, including myself?) and other various injuries. Kraig and I also spent about a week doing the family/friend holiday thing.

Since then, I had a party on New year's eve and surgery on the labral tear in my hip. So far so good: I am up and walking around and generally not in pain (though the band-aids that I keep covering my stitches with itch like hell!). I feel like I must be recovering quickly since my follow-up with the surgeon isn't until next Friday but I am already climbing flights of stairs with relatively little trouble and occasionally finding my leg in positions that I wasn't aware of putting it in. I'm still a little leary of rotating my hip open too far (think sitting cross-legged) but I've managed to rotate my knee open past the point where it hurt pre-surgery, and with no sharp pain. As long as there isn't much for scar tissue, I think I'm good to go.

I am, however, a bit torn about actually going to a PT for recovery. My sensible side knows that of course I have to go to a PT! One does after surgery! But then my thrifty, impulsive side reasons that it probably wouldn't be all that helpful: I havn't lost much muscle in my leg since I was only off of it for a few days, I already know a buttload of strengthening exercises, and I'm very aware of the difference between good pain and bad pain. Plus they are so freaking expensive, even with health insurance. Except for the lady who diagnosed my hip (she's moved to another practice a bit too far away), I have had only mediocre experiences with PT's. I figure that I will discuss this with the surgeon, he will tell me to see a PT, and I will make up my mind based on anything new he can add to my reasoning.

PS- I'd like everyone to give Kraig a big hug next time they see him, because he's been just wonderful helping me through all the post-op stuff. I was so out of it after surgery at the hospital, they didn't even bother talking to me anymore, they just told him all of the post-op instructions.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Whimsy

When I took Holly to the vet a lady there asked me if I'd been in an accident because of my excessive ace bandaging. I've eschewed wrapping my wrist since my ace bandage is too thick for wrists and I think that it is making my thumb hurt. I've decided that my thumb is more important than my wrist (or practically anything, since it's what makes opening doors possible. haha Gabby).


I usually press zero repeatedly until I get a person:


My ankle's doing better and with any luck I won't have trouble doing barre on Wednesday. It doesn't have a choice about dancing on Saturday and Sunday.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Strange week...

I sprained my ankle last night leaving Dance On. I think I stepped on a rock and it made my ankle roll. It freaking killed. I managed to drive home (only time I've regretted driving stick - left ankle) but couldn't get up the stairs to my apartment. Kraig had to come carry me. I slept with it up on a stack of pillows (ie didn't sleep much) and it seems to have done the trick. I am almost walking normally again, though it still hurts. I have a week and a half before I have to throw myself around on pointe shoes. Let's see if I'm still as resilient as I was in high school.

I've also had a bone moving around in my left wrist for a while. My chiropractor adjusted it Monday and I've been wrapping it in an ace bandage since then to keep from using it much. I feel like I've been hit by a bus or something; I'm all bandaged up.

Holly

is very fluffy and has issues with the fur on her bum getting matted. She is currently shut in the bathroom with food, water, a litter pan and a towel to sleep on so that she doesn't scoot herself around the house and make a mess. She has a grooming appointment for tomorrow.

The strange thing is that Gabby

doesn't seem to mind that she's missing her sister, and is acting much happier than she has in a while. I think I might have to shut Holly up every once in a while so that Gabby can assert some dominance. Any ideas? Gabby actually had a decent sized scrape on her neck recently that I assume is from sparring with Holly.

Anyways, back to grading. I'm doing the lecture tomorrow too, and it's going to be weird handing back the homeworks myself. Fortunately I haven't been too much of a bitch on this one!

Friday, November 14, 2008

Damnit

When I throw my hair up in a clip, it looks a little too much like Sarah Palin's coif. Annoyance...

I might have to dye it red for a while.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Mood swings and seasonal update

Hi everyone. Been a while...

I am definitely tired of this whole grad school thing. 3 consecutive sucky summers is more than enough and I hope that I find some gainful employment for next summer. I'm looking already. It's gotten to the point where I am so generally frustrated that any minor issue will be upsetting enough that I have trouble working for the next couple of days. Unfortunately with math, if your brain isn't functioning particularly well due to emotions, lack of sleep, or extreme stress, you can't work because you can't think. Fortunately, my next deadlines aren't until next spring, but I still need to get a hell of a lot done before then.



For anyone that I haven't told yet, because I guess that my communication skills are sub-par lately, I am having hip surgery on January 8th. I have a labral tear in my right hip from falling on my ass this summer and a surgeon is going to go in and trim it a bit so that it's smooth. I'm supposed to be walking a few days after the surgery and it's a standard 6-8 week recovery. I am actually looking forward to some enforced downtime and pampering. I am especially looking forward to my hip not hurting anymore.



I think that I am probably sinking into my usual cycle of seasonal depression. The days are short and getting colder. I find myself not wanting to leave the house because of the effort involved in bundling up. I am working on updating my winter wardrobe though. I need to swing by TJMaxx and find some thick tights to wear under skirts and boots. I have a bit of an aversion to them since I had to wear them in grade school under dresses, but I can probably avoid the pilly, bunchy, worn-out cotton tights that I remember and detest.

I know, gloom and misery. I hope the pictures help. I'll try to update when I have something cheery to relate.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

I love this

The New York Times
September 11, 2008
Op-Ed Columnist

In the Seventh Year

And in the seventh year after the fall, the dust and debris of the towers cleared. And it became plain at last what had been wrought.

For the wreckage begat greed; and it came to pass that while America’s young men and women fought, other Americans enriched themselves. Beguiling the innocent, they did backdate options, and they did package toxic mortgage securities and they did reprice risk on the basis that it no more existed than famine in a fertile land.

Thereby did the masters of the universe prosper, with gold, with silver shekels, with land rich in cattle and fowl, with illegal manservants and maids, with jewels and silk, and with Gulfstream V business jets; yet the whole land did not prosper with them. And it came to pass, when the housing bubble burst, that Main Street had to pay for the Wall Street party.

For Bush ruled over the whole nation and so sure was he of his righteousness that he did neglect husbandry.

And he took his nation into desert wars and mountain wars, but, lo, he thought not to impose taxation, not one heifer nor sheep nor ox did Bush demand of the rich. And it came to pass that the nation fell into debt as boundless as the wickedness of Sodom. For everyone, Lehman not least, was maxed out.

So heavy was the burden of war, and of bailing out Fannie and Freddie, and of financing debt with China, that not one silver shekel remained to build bridges, nor airports, nor high-speed trains, nor even to take care of wounded vets; and the warriors returning unto their homes from distant combat thought a blight had fallen on the land.

So it was in the seventh year after the fall of the towers. And still Bush did raise his hands to the Lord and proclaim: “I will be proved right in the end!”

And around the whole earth, which had stood with America, there arose a great trouble, for it seemed to peoples abroad that a great nation, rich in flocks and herds and land and water, had been cast among thorns and Philistines; its promise betrayed, its light dimmed, its armies stretched, its budget broken, its principles compromised, its dollar diminished.

And it came to pass that this profligate nation, drinking oil with insatiable thirst, could not cure itself of this addiction, and so its wealth was transferred to other nations that did not always wish it well.

Wherefore the balance of power in the world was altered in grievous ways, and new centers of authority arose, and they were no more persuaded by democracy than was the Pharaoh.

For Bush ruled over the whole nation, and so sure was he of his righteousness that he did neglect the costs of wanton consumption. And he believed that if the Lord created fossil fuel, fossil fuel must flow without end, as surely as the grape will yield wine.

Therefore, in the seventh year after the fall, with 1,126 of the slain still unidentified, their very beings rendered unto dust, their souls inhabiting the air of New York, it seemed that one nation had become two; and loss, far from unifying the people, had sundered the nation.

For the rich, granted tax breaks more generous than any blessing, grew richer, and incomes in the middle ceased to rise, and workers saw jobs leaving the land for that region called Asia. And some fought wars while others shopped; and some got foreclosed while others got clothes. And still Bush spake but few listened.

Behold, so it was in the seventh year, and it seemed that America was doubly smitten, from without and within.

And, lo, a strange thing did come to pass. For as surely as the seasons do alternate, so the ruler and party that have brought woe to a nation must give way to others who can lead their people to plenty. How can the weary, flogged ass bear honey and balm and almonds and myrrh?

Yet many Americans believed the exhausted beast could still provide bounty. They did hold that a people called the French was to blame. They did accuse a creation called the United Nations. They did curse the ungodly sophisticates of Gotham and Hollywood and sinful Chicago; and, lo, they proclaimed God was on their side, and carried a gun, and Darwin was bunk, and truth resided in Alaska.

For Bush ruled over the whole nation and so sure was he of his righteousness that he did foster division until it raged like a plague. Each tribe sent pestilence on the other.

And in the seventh year after the fall, the dust and debris of the towers cleared. And it became plain at last what had been wrought — but not how the damage would be undone.

Friday, August 29, 2008

Feel free to comment, but don't tell me your views

I think that I have decided that I don't want to know or discuss other people's political views until the election is over.
Because if they differ much from my own, I just don't want to be friends with that person. And if they don't differ, then there is no point in talking about it.

Barack '08

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Get your skinny ass to the gym!

This article caught my attention, and I am not surprised, but it makes me glad. Maybe I'll throw out my scale after all...

Better to Be Fat and Fit Than Skinny and Unfit
By TARA PARKER-POPE
Published: August 18, 2008
New York Times

Often, a visit to the doctor’s office starts with a weigh-in. But is a person’s weight really a reliable indicator of overall health?

Increasingly, medical research is showing that it isn’t. Despite concerns about an obesity epidemic, there is growing evidence that our obsession about weight as a primary measure of health may be misguided.

Last week a report in The Archives of Internal Medicine compared weight and cardiovascular risk factors among a representative sample of more than 5,400 adults. The data suggest that half of overweight people and one-third of obese people are “metabolically healthy.” That means that despite their excess pounds, many overweight and obese adults have healthy levels of “good” cholesterol, blood pressure, blood glucose and other risks for heart disease.

At the same time, about one out of four slim people — those who fall into the “healthy” weight range — actually have at least two cardiovascular risk factors typically associated with obesity, the study showed.

To be sure, being overweight or obese is linked with numerous health problems, and even in the most recent research, obese people were more likely to have two or more cardiovascular risk factors than slim people. But researchers say it is the proportion of overweight and obese people who are metabolically healthy that is so surprising.

“We use ‘overweight’ almost indiscriminately sometimes,” said MaryFran Sowers, a co-author of the study and professor of epidemiology at the University of Michigan. “But there is lots of individual variation within that, and we need to be cognizant of that as we think about what our health messages should be.”

The data follow a report last fall from researchers at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and the National Cancer Institute showing that overweight people appear to have longer life expectancies than so-called normal weight adults.

But many people resist the notion that people who are overweight or obese can be healthy. Several prominent health researchers have criticized the findings from the C.D.C. researchers as misleading, noting that mortality statistics don’t reflect the poor quality of life and suffering obesity can cause. And on the Internet, various blog posters, including readers of the Times’s Well blog, have argued that the data are deceptive, masking the fact that far more overweight and obese people are at higher cardiovascular risk than thin people.

Part of the problem may be our skewed perception of what it means to be overweight. Typically, a person is judged to be of normal weight based on body mass index, or B.M.I., which measures weight relative to height. A normal B.M.I. ranges from 18.5 to 25. Once B.M.I. reaches 25, a person is viewed as overweight. Thirty or higher is considered obese.

“People get confused by the words and the mental image they get,” said Katherine Flegal, senior research scientist at the C.D.C.’s National Center for Health Statistics. “People may think, ‘How could it be that a person who is so huge wouldn’t have health problems?’ But people with B.M.I.’s of 25 are pretty unremarkable.”

Several studies from researchers at the Cooper Institute in Dallas have shown that fitness — determined by how a person performs on a treadmill — is a far better indicator of health than body mass index. In several studies, the researchers have shown that people who are fat but can still keep up on treadmill tests have much lower heart risk than people who are slim and unfit.

In December, a study in The Journal of the American Medical Association looked at death rates among 2,600 adults 60 and older over 12 years. Notably, death rates among the overweight, those with a B.M.I. of 25 to 30, were slightly lower than in normal weight adults. Death rates were highest among those with a B.M.I. of 35 or more.

But the most striking finding was that fitness level, regardless of body mass index, was the strongest predictor of mortality risk. Those with the lowest level of fitness, as measured on treadmill tests, were four times as likely to die during the 12-year study than those with the highest level of fitness. Even those who had just a minimal level of fitness had half the risk of dying compared with those who were least fit.

During the test, the treadmill moved at a brisk walking pace as the grade increased each minute. In the study, it didn’t take much to qualify as fit. For men, it meant staying on the treadmill at least 8 minutes; for women, 5.5 minutes. The people who fell below those levels, whether fat or thin, were at highest risk.

The results were adjusted to control for age, smoking and underlying heart problems and still showed that fitness, not weight, was most important in predicting mortality risk.

Stephen Blair, a co-author of the study and a professor at the Arnold School of Public Health at the University of South Carolina, said the lesson he took from the study was that instead of focusing only on weight loss, doctors should be talking to all patients about the value of physical activity, regardless of body size.

“Why is it such a stretch of the imagination,” he said, “to consider that someone overweight or obese might actually be healthy and fit?”

Monday, April 28, 2008

Habits

My teaching dance is like a drug addict selling to support his habit. I seriously think that I spend more on dance classes and clothes than I make. And yet somehow I am always out of shape and my clothes are always frumpy. My feet OD'ed on pointe yesterday, and while it was tons of fun, I am having trouble walking today. I bruised the edge of one of my big-toe nails and I have a blister the size of a quarter on the sole of my other foot. I would probably have more blisters, but I taped some of my toes before rehearsal started. On a happier note, Miranda's piece is seriously fun shit (as always). I think it's another one that I would happily do every day for the rest of my life...

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

I'm performing again!

Dance Prism presents Make Way for Ducklings on April 5th, 6th, 13th, 20th at 2:30 pm in various locations (click the link for details). It's a really cute ballet. Definitely fun and family friendly.

Monday, February 11, 2008

Recent things that I have to laugh at myself for

I got soap in my martini last night. Where do I start to explain this?

I've been feeling kinda icky recently in a low-energy, might be getting sick sort of way. I sat on the couch pretty much all day Saturday and so on Sunday I booted myself out of the house to go to Miranda's ballet and jazz class. That thoroughly kicked my ass, in a good way, but I was still exhausted afterwards. So I went home, prepped for my class this morning, and made myself a drink. Then I decided it would be a really good idea to take a bath and read the rest of my book. That went really well. I lit some candles and turned bright red cuz the water was a bit too hot.

Things that didn't happen:
I could have tipped over my martini, which was perched on the side of the tub.
I could have dropped the book in the water, though I'm a fairly experienced bath reader.
The cats could have tried to either get in the tub or drink the water, which would have been really bad since I put epsom salts in the tub, and apparently their primary therapeutic use is as a laxative (who knew?).
I could have lit my hair on fire, since I was sitting next to two lighted candles (in holders, but I'm clumsy).

But no, none of those things happened. I figured that since I'd been sweating a lot, both before and during my bath, I should probably wash off before going to bed. So I soap up the loofah, start soaping, and PLOP! I get a dollop of soap right in my half-drunk martini. I was so bummed, I even tried a sip but decided that it was disgusting. So much for that...



PS- A guy just popped his head into my office to ask if I wanted to buy books or something. I have no idea, never seen him before. But during the 5 seconds he was in my airspace he managed to stink up my entire office! I hate perfume! It's disgusting! Just don't wear it. Don't. Bathe more.

Thursday, February 7, 2008

Who's not surprised?

Apparently there is a correlation between drinking diet soda and "metabolic syndrome — the collection of risk factors for cardiovascular disease and diabetes that include abdominal obesity, high cholesterol and blood glucose levels — and elevated blood pressure." Really. They do point out that these symptoms may just be the lifestyle associated with diet soda drinkers, and not something directly caused by diet soda.

I'm not surprised. Unless you drink it for the taste, in which case your taste buds need some adjustment, you have to be pretty naive to drink diet soda. It's not any better for you (apparently, it could be worse) than regular soda. In my rather limited experience, people who drink diet soda tend to have intensely unhealthy lifestyles, characterized by poor diet and a lack of exercise. So any of you diet drinkers reading this, please switch to water and start exercising. Actually, cutting soda or diet soda out of your diet is almost guaranteed to lose you 10 lbs.

What am I actually surprised about? I'm going to San Diego for a week in July. I am the only graduate student in the Tufts chapter of SIAM (society for industrial and applied mathematics) who is neither graduating nor getting married this summer. Since someone from the club should go, that makes me it. May I point out that I don't do industrial or applied mathematics? I'm not even particularly interested! (I went to the meeting for the pizza.) But I've never been to San Diego, the chapter will cover most of my expenses, and at the moment I have nothing better to do this summer. So what the hell...

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

I found my sock

It had gotten caught in a leotard. Figures. I really hate getting up this early in the morning. Most of the time when I wake up and my alarm says 6:30, my first thought is, oh good, I get to go back to sleep. Now my first thought is, shit, I'm late.

I'm really tempted to purge my friends on myspace. I don't mind having a million people on facebook that I knew in college or high school (or even grade school). But for some reason, I'd rather not have people I don't know well added on myspace. Mostly, it's the stupid-ass bulletins some people keep posting. Now I really understand why there's the option at the bottom of a bulletin to remove someone from friends. A bulletin shouldn't be a survey, or chain mail, or random stuff that you do while you're bored. Those all go in your blog people. A bulletin should be an announcement, like that you have new pictures, or a show coming up, or that you're moving. I'm going to start deleting people if they frequently post annoying bulletins. You are warned.

On a similar note, I need more people to stalk on livejournal...

Monday, January 28, 2008

Small lists

Thanks for the idea Karen, though mine may be somewhat less deep:


BEST of today:
Two and a half hour nap after school
Yoga class down the street this evening
My check engine light turned off again (it's been turning on and off)
Snow melted during the day


WORST of today:
Waking up before sunrise
Nasty traffic during my morning commute (an hour and a half to get to school. it's usually 45 mins in traffic. needless to say I was late (only 5 mins))
Lost one of my favorite socks in the laundry (last night, but it's still on my mind)
There will be ice all over the ground tonight because of the snow melting

I'll post more at some point, maybe to give you background about the day's events, or maybe I'll forget until next week when today has faded into the irrelevant past and I'll tell you something about the future...

Monday, December 31, 2007

Happy New Year!

I'm going to spend today pretending to be Bilbo Baggins preparing for his 111th birthday. This is a way to make cleaning my apartment and getting everything ready for my party fun. Who says I've forgotten how to be a kid :) I definitely haven't forgotten how to be a geek...

New Year's Resolutions:

1) Have more fun. Primarily, go out and hang around with people.
2) Go to yoga classes. I found a good place down the street.
3) Do Pilates. There are amazing classes at Green St. but they're really expensive. Mostly I have to make myself do this.

I'll stop there. There are a few more things that I probably could add to that list, but I'm trying to be realistic and these are my top priority.

Happy New Year everyone! If I'm not seeing you tonight, I hope you have fun anyways :)

Saturday, December 29, 2007

Crap, at least I dance a lot

Op-Ed Contributor
The Hangover That Lasts

By PAUL STEINBERG
Published: December 29, 2007
New York Times


WASHINGTON

NEW Year’s Eve tends to be the day of the year with the most binge drinking (based on drunken driving fatalities), followed closely by Super Bowl Sunday. Likewise, colleges have come to expect that the most alcohol-filled day of their students’ lives is their 21st birthday. So, some words of caution for those who continue to binge and even for those who have stopped: just as the news is not so great for former cigarette smokers, there is equally bad news for recovering binge-drinkers who have achieved a sobriety that has lasted years. The more we have binged — and the younger we have started to binge — the more we experience significant, though often subtle, effects on the brain and cognition.

Much of the evidence for the impact of frequent binge-drinking comes from some simple but elegant studies done on lab rats by Fulton T. Crews and his former student Jennifer Obernier. Dr. Crews, the director of the University of North Carolina Bowles Center for Alcohol Studies, and Dr. Obernier have shown that after a longstanding abstinence following heavy binge-drinking, adult rats can learn effectively — but they cannot relearn.

When put into a tub of water and forced to continue swimming until they find a platform on which to stand, the sober former binge-drinking rats and the normal control rats (who had never been exposed to alcohol) learned how to find the platform equally well. But when the experimenters abruptly moved the platform, the two groups of rats had remarkably different performances. The rats without previous exposure to alcohol, after some brief circling, were able to find the new location. The former binge-drinking rats, however, were unable to find the new platform; they became confused and kept circling the site of the old platform.

This circling occurs, Dr. Crews says, because the former binge-drinking rats continued to show neurotoxicity in the hippocampus long after (in rat years) becoming sober. On a microscopic level, Dr. Crews has shown that heavy binge-drinking in rats diminishes the genesis of nerve cells, shrinks the development of the branchlike connections between brain cells and contributes to neuronal cell death. The binges activate an inflammatory response in rat brains rather than a pure regrowth of normal neuronal cells. Even after longstanding sobriety this inflammatory response translates into a tendency to stay the course, a diminished capacity for relearning and maladaptive decision-making.

Studies have also shown that binge drinking clearly damages the adolescent brain more than the adult brain. The forebrain — specifically the orbitofrontal cortex, which uses associative information to envision future outcomes — can be significantly damaged by binge drinking. Indeed, heavy drinking in early or middle adolescence, with this consequent cortical damage, can lead to diminished control over cravings for alcohol and to poor decision-making. One can easily fail to recognize the ultimate consequences of one’s actions.

Does the research on rats have relevance for the more complex brains and behavior of humans? We have come to think so. Dr. Crews has shown that the cingulate cortex in the human brain shows signs of neuroinflammation after repeated alcohol binges, similar to that in rats. Sidney Cohen, one of the clearest thinkers and researchers on the effects of alcohol and drugs on humans (now deceased, he was at one time the director of the drug abuse division at the National Institute of Mental Health), pointed out that we are programmed as a species for accelerated learning in adolescence and young adulthood. This heightened capacity is the reason we go into apprenticeships or on to college and graduate school in these crucial years.

As Dr. Cohen noted, we not only learn specific skills during these years, with our brains having developed more fully, we also learn in a more subtle way how to deal with ambiguity. Ambiguity comes into play when the goalposts are moved. Can we change course? Can we deal with this ambiguity and with nuances?

The one piece of good news is that exercise has been shown to stimulate the regrowth and development of normal neural tissue in former alcohol-drinking mice. In fact, this neurogenesis was greater in the exercising former drinking mice than that induced by exercise in the control group that had never been exposed to alcohol.

So, some possible resolutions for the New Year:



Stop after one or two drinks. Studies of the Mediterranean diet have shown that one or two drinks on a consistent basis leads to a longer life than pure teetotaling.



If you must binge, start at age 40, not at age 16 — and always have someone else drive. Just as youth is wasted on the young, so perhaps is alcohol.



If you have binged excessively when younger, follow it up with some regular exercise. Get those brain cells regenerated.

As Shakespeare once pointed out without the benefit of studies on lab rats, “O God, that men should put an enemy in their mouths to steal away their brains!”

Paul Steinberg is a psychiatrist.